The Day Before...
J and I, after consulting our folks, decided we should just go ahead with the wedding tomorrow despite Ma J's ill health.
I did say this was going to be a busy week of firsts, though now it is busier than we had anticipated. So on the day before the wedding, J is out with his sis visiting employment agencies to see if they could hire a domestic helper to be with his folks when Ma J does finally get to go home. And I am actually at home after a week out running errands and hanging out at the Tan Tock Seng hospital - seated now by the ibook, downloading information on caring for stroke patients, sipping my coffee, while writing a 12 page report I owe my boss (as more things - always urgent - crop up at work), getting some distraction completing this drawing and trying not to think about what else I should be doing now.
One step at a time!
about the drawing
J and I were talking last night about what it means to care for one's parents. Being the youngest son and having lived away from home all these years, that responsibility had never fallen on him. For some, caring for your parents may mean taking them out for a meal every week, nagging them about that healthcheck and making conversation. For others, that responsibility is partly devolved by hiring a fulltime caregiver - a stayhome nurse or a domestic helper.
This week at the hospital, we saw two old ladies (in the same ward as Ma J) spend their days at the hospital with their Indonesian helper - they watch the television together, chitchat in fluent Bahasa Indonesia or Malay and sometimes even Cantonese, take walks and share meals. Everything a mother and daughter would do together.